Some things are extremely rare: And there's not much we at PotP can do about the first three, except rail at the government "Boooo stop it, you nasty government!
Mainly by dint of the single that wasn't that much of a hit the first time around, but has become, through filesharing sites: Have you not seen it? For the following reasons: There is an attractive young man explaining the benefits of a telephucking. As you can see, in that little storyboard, it is carefully explained that should you have a little spare time before your bus, you might consider phoning a sex line, handing over your credit card number and requesting someone "really hot" phone you back.
Other people might suggest having a cup of tea. He may have been svelte at the time of In the Navy, but by the time of Sex Over the Phone in , Glenn Hughes was older, more mature, and filling his biker suit in a way that makes you wonder if they'd invented leather-effect lycra in the mid 80s. Whatever was happening from the neck down, though, the power of the handlebar moustache overrode it all. Here he is displaying one of the potential uses of a phone: And that is, in fact, one of the interesting things about the video.
I mean, I'm not saying that a modern interpretation of hands-off ish safe sex would be better — I don't want to watch five middle-aged dancers masturbating in front of a computer any more than the next person — no mater how marvellous their moustaches. But the fact is: There are only so many ways you can use a phone handset in a dance routine but it's fun to watch them try.
This is one of the least inventive. It's also one of the most terrifying images. Because while the heavy breathing And almost completely pointless. Because it's a phone. Not quite as forcefully as this man, however. It doesn't look quite as much like he's having phone sex as shouting "ARSE! Which may well be a service that was available in , but, luckily, since then we've discovered you can shout "ARSE! I wouldn't shout arse at this man, however. Not only has he got a phone nine times the size of his head that he could club me to death with — Really?
Phone sex on that? Wouldn't your wrist get tired? Here, one of our Village friends — having disposed gleefully of his shirt — is demonstrating how one might effectively use a phone. And also how one might ineffectively use it: Because seriously, there's not that much point handing over your credit card number if you're just going to rub your nipples with the earpiece.
Unless you have eardrums in your nipples, in which case you need to write a whole new song. Possibly one about the things your shirt says to your tie when no one is listening.
I would totally download that song. Another example of the awesome qualities that make this video compulsory viewing. On purpose, it seems. If they're spinning right, he's spinning left; he's popping through the crowd, talking on the phone to his own personal hottie in the phone-sex orgy, while all the rest are left talking to each other. Not that it's about talking to other men. Oh no, I mean, if nothing else, it puts to rest finally those scurrilous rumours about the Village People being gay.
I mean look at these heavily pixelated pictures of people you might have phone sex with. They are, at least, occasionally long-haired, and almost certainly in women's clothing. When they join the boys on the dancefloor, though, they do look at least from afar like female versions of Village People characters. From afar — and frankly, that's all that matters.
Who cares about the sex of these people, who cares about the realness of the moustache or the fact that, really, it might be safe sex but holding a handset to your tummy is a waste of money. All we care about is that really, if you haven't seen this video before, you should do, and if you have, you should do again, because it's eight shades of awesome.
This man thinks so: That's why he's skipping. Also because he likes premium-rate phonelines: Now please excuse me, I need to go and call my psychic about what next week's video should be.