We shall see just who is 'average'! Neurosis in the intro. As in those games, you have to input commands at the right time during the movie or face sudden death, and have to retry. Compared to Dragon's Lair, Brain Dead 13 gives the player slightly more time to make decisions and actually tells you when you entered a wrong command instead of killing you, as Dragon's Lair does , but there's much less of an idea of what you're supposed to do and when and some of the inputs are downright counterintuitive.
Combine that with Everything Trying to Kill You and you've got yourself a challenge. You star as computer fixit Lance Galahad, who is hired on a routine repair job to the creepy old castle just outside town, but discovers that he's been tricked into fixing the computer of Mad Scientist Dr.
Nero Neurosis, who now plans on using his master server to take over the world. Unfortunately for Lance, he makes the mistake of pointing out how cliche Neurosis' plot is, which, of course, doesn't exactly go over well. Lance finds himself on the run from the doctor's psychotic henchman, Fritz, and now has to find his way through the oddly large castle, fight the various other villains who live there, make it back to Neurosis' computer and shut it down, taking out Neurosis for good.
The game features several unique, vibrant areas and characters, including the seductive but sadistic Vivi, who has the intent of giving you the best, and last, makeover you'll ever have, and Moose, the Frankenstein's Monster with the brain of a mindless jock.
The areas are interesting but challenging, since standing still at any point will leave you dead faster than you can blink.
This game provides examples of: At the beginning of the Giant Statue stage, this acid pool will form under the ground tiles Lance is standing on, and if you wait too long, they will wobble and collapse under his weight and cause him to fall in and drown! There is also another acid pool in the fountain, and he will fall in if he can't find something to grab onto, like a gargoyle statue. He will also fall into the same pool in other death scenes.
Vivi, to both Lance who she tries to chop and Fritz who she tosses into a spiked coffin. Lance does this in a victory pose after defeating Dr. Neurosis and watching his lair explode. All Witches Have Cats: The twin witches each have a black cat in their room, which is very obvious. Every foe that Lance encounters has a different kind of skin: Fritz's skin is kinda grayish-yellow, Vivi's skin is a lighter shade of purple, and Moose's skin is forest green.
Only Lance himself has even a vaguely healthy human skin tone. American Kirby Is Hardcore: When the game was first released in the U. The game plays off the deaths as this, but despite the Bloodless Carnage , they can get pretty graphic.
An Arm and a Leg: Lance can end up dead like this in a "manicure" if you don't help him escape Vivi's attempts to cut off his hand. Parodied in the game box cover art, shown above, which says, "Starring Fritz". More like "hook, harpoon, chainsaw" crazy, but you get the idea. Lance makes a pose like this in resurrection scenes and in the final confrontation, showing that he is brave in the face of certain death. One of the two reasons why Lance is alive and kicking among a castleful of monsters and undead beings.
Bat Out of Hell: The bats in the Trophy Room. Somewhat downplayed when one of them a giant bat wraps around Lance and starts playfully chewing on his head while Lance gets a slightly irritated look, in one scene that is less of a death scene and more of a cutesy mosquito bite scene.
In one part of the scene, Moose wields one giant baseball bat, intending to bash Lance's brains out if you're not quick or careful. Bears Are Bad News: In one death scene in the Trophy Room, a bear rug comes to life and mauls Lance down to the ground, and there is a Discretion Shot in which his body parts green ooze, bones, eyeballs, baseball cap fly over the place. Neurosis does this on noticing that Fritz has been tricked into completely damaging his computer and machinery after Lance defeats him; this is followed by the Big Bad 's shout of "Fritz, you imbecile!
Lance blows up Neurosis and his computer with one of these. Black Comedy Bloodless Carnage: Despite all the horrible ways to die, none of them show any blood or gore.
The only exception is that there is a scene with the red blood in the transfusion bag, and that is in the resurrection scene when Lance gets his blood back in the "Vivi's Salon" sequence. Lance does this while taunting Moose from the top of the basketball net: I'll take a rain check on that Of course, this will turn into a Sedgwick Speech if he doesn't avoid Fritz's attack and get out of the salon.
Neurosis, taking offense to the hero calling him an "average mad scientist". Lance can fall into one and die if he hasn't beaten all the bosses before meeting up with Fritz in the final battle. Lance, more "gagged" than "bound", at Vivi's salon. And he will remain that way until you choose the facial. When Lance tells Vivi, " I'll take a rain check on that While being chased up the stairs to Moose's room, Lance is stopped by a gap at the summit of the stairs.
What does he do? He grabs a dangling chain in front of him and swings across the gap to safety near the entrance. Fritz, who has a chance of getting injured in every single room. Let alone the final battle In either witch scene when a black cat encounters Lance, it will get into a cat fight and slice his head into bits.
Fritz at one point attaches one to his wrist. The eyeballs from the rooms of the twin witches. It later helps Lance out for use as a tetherball weapon against Fritz in the final confrontation.
Of course, this still doesn't answer the question of why Lance picked up the eyeballs in the first place. Vivi gets this when she's defeated by her own Mortifier-Beautifier. In one death scene on the stairs, Fritz takes multiple swings of the ax and hacks Lance into bits, and they all fall down the stairs, starting with his legs and ending with his head.
It happens in some death scenes involving Fritz specifically the "egg beater death" and the "balcony death". The result of Lance's pressing the Big Red "Flush" Button that can cause the castle to self-destruct. Everything, except him, Lance and Fritz is in CG.
There's a room the Wine Cellar where a giant centipede comes out of a hole. And it'll bite Lance's head off if you're not quick. Cruel and Unusual Death: Some of these may vary, from being torn apart vertically at the eyes by Fritz, to getting your own skull knocked off of your head. Cut His Heart Out with a Spoon: During a Wingding Eyes segment revolving around how badly Fritz is going to kill Lance, a high heel shoe appears. Lance has to do this to " stay alive " while dodging a hail of bullets that Trigger Happy Fritz shoots at both our hero and Neurosis.
And it all takes place entirely in the darkness , where the only tiny pillars of light are used as a disco dance floor. If Lance chooses the "shave" which is rather odd, since he doesn't have any facial hair , Vivi will spray him with green shaving cream, and she will use this small scythe to try and kill him in this dangerous way , a la Sweeney Todd. The final confrontation takes place entirely in blackness.
And since Fritz appears to settle the score once and for all, it can mean death for you if you don't act quickly.
Occurs in a couple of deaths, including falling into a spiked pit and being eaten by the frog in the maze down one of the wrong paths. Lance in part defeats Neurosis by tricking Fritz into shooting him.
The witches are both defeated by constantly running away until they slam into a wall at high speed. In the main entryway scene, Fritz will jump from the top and land on top of Lance, killing him and making a grave. This is easily avoided. Death Is a Slap on the Wrist: Since you have unlimited lives in this interactive game, you'll always start where you last left off when you die. One puppet on a string in the conservatory will grab Lance by the neck with its strings, choke him, and pull him up offscreen into unseen death in one death scene.
Lance has to keep on the move at all times, otherwise Fritz will immediately show up and kill him. At no time is it safe to stop and get your bearings, since the psychotic little jerk is on your coattails.
Happens when Lance is slashed by one of the witches' black cats or when Fritz hits him with a saber. Lance, in some of the death scenes. A couple of the deaths result in this, such as a book getting stuck in Lance's throat or a huge stone football thrown into his mouth. Neurosis really wants Lance dead Distracted by the Sexy: Fritz while looking at Vivi. Does This Remind You of Anything? Lance gets fatally poisoned by an evil Mushroom Man in the maze in one death scene.
The Door Slams You: This happens to the centipede in the wine cellar, except that when it chases Lance towards the exit, he opens the door and intentionally slams it into its face, putting it out of commission.
Quite a common death sequence. Fritz will eat Lance in several scenes when he catches him; two separate fates along this line occur within seconds of each other in Vivi's Salon a ridiculously tiny spider will swallow Lance whole if he doesn't blow it away, and Vivi will be unable to resist draining his blood if he waits too long to choose a shave, manicure, or facial ; two wrong paths in the maze can lead to Lance being devoured by a mutant frog or a carnivorous plant